Ghost of Christmas Future

[st_arkintern]

"Mr. Stark?"

Peter stands at the edge of the bed that Tony shares with Thor. He wears the Iron Spider armor Tony made for him, the faint glint of the moon through the thin slit between either side of the curtain reflecting off the suit's dark colors.

Peter's hair is styled differently from the Peter here at the inn; it's longer, more wild, even floppy. School had grown more and more demanding as the end of his sophomore year approached and balancing school and his time as Spider-Man was difficult. He had promised May he'd maintain his grades as part of the Spider-Man Negotiations of 2017, but criminals didn't stop just because he had two papers to write by Friday, a quiz tomorrow, and a test next Tuesday.

Hair had been less of a priority. Peter couldn't put off his homework if he wanted to continue being Spider-Man; he couldn't put off his evening patrol if he wanted to protect Queens, either. There were no serious long-term consequences to not getting his hair cut (save for perhaps more bullying from Flash, who was prone to bullying him anyway). A haircut could wait until later.

Peter always thought there'd be more time later.

Tony doesn't stir. Peter presses his lips together -- a nervous habit acquired when he was still alive -- and draws a little closer. He resists the natural urge to place a hand on Tony's shoulder to wake him; he knows that his fingers will slip right through. Instead he repeats, this time a little louder:

"Mr. Stark?"

Comments

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

“If it’s where I think it is, our best spacecraft would be lucky to reach it within two years.” Tony held his midsection as if he could feel the wound of his other self.

[st_ormbreaker]

"Asgard is gone, but I'm still able to summon the Bifrost. I can go anywhere in the universe. Even Titan."

The only thing the Bifrost wasn't capable of, apparently, was leaving this place. Thor had tried, repeatedly.

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

His eyes softened slightly at that revelation. At the very least, that woman stranded with him would be saved as well. One light he can say he salvaged despite each and every stunning failure. Tony tilted his head up. When he saw the heavy guilt written across Thor’s face, it all came together. The unspoken truths weighing down even the small things between them. Even so, he didn’t have the energy left to ask, or to even summon anger. His break from reality had left him too barren.

“Wherever you’re going after you return...take me with you.”

[st_ormbreaker]

Thor's expression softens at Tony's request. He should have known this was coming.

"You know how much we've lost," he says. "I'm not going to risk losing you on top of it."

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

"O-Oh. This again." Whatever energy Tony thought he didn't have was now making itself found, and he slid out of Thor's grasp. "Your buddy Quill's good enough to make plans with, but not another Avenger. Gotcha."

[st_ormbreaker]

"We already believed Quill to be dead," he says. "The only thing we've discussed in-depth is where I might find Thanos now."

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

"Yeah. Quill's dead. I saw it. But not before he--he..." Tony pushed off the bed, needing to move as the restlessness ripped through him. "You do not get to deny me my stake in this."

[st_ormbreaker]

"If you saw Thanos on Titan, you already know how powerful he is." He'd been powerful enough with just one Infinity Stone on the Asgardian arc. "You have Pepper waiting for you back on Earth."

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

"Do I?" Tony turned for the door.

[st_ormbreaker]

Thor stands and moves to block Tony's exit.

"You might," he says. "That's reason enough to stay behind."

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

“Then I guess Tony Stark will do what he does best with or without the God of Thunder keeping a close eye on him.” Tony didn’t make to force his way through like before, but he didn’t budge.

“Thor. Please. Stop holding back.” His mask almost gave. “I can’t go on like this.”

[st_ormbreaker]

Thor wishes he could make Tony understand why he feels this way -- that after losing so much, he couldn't stand to lose anything else, least of all him.

"If you come with me, there's a good chance you're going to die." As much as he sometimes seems it, Thor isn't an idiot, and he knows Tony isn't, either. He knows there's a good chance he's going to die, but he's ready to go forward with it anyway.

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

Tony shook his head, steadfast. “Then I’ll do it with you.”

[st_ormbreaker]

Without Thor even noticing it, it felt like their roles had suddenly shifted.

Thor was moved by Tony's insistence -- his willingness to traverse the universe with him in search of a man who could possibly kill them both. Tony had far more to lose and far more to risk. Thor had survived so much and from what he pieced together, he'd almost been killed by Thanos once already. Even if Tony managed to live through it all, there was the possibility that Thor wouldn't, and Tony would be trapped out in space, alone, with no way to return home.

It pained him to think of Tony like that: dead or half-dead or drifting out in space. He preferred to imagine Tony, happy with Pepper (who like Gamora, he had hoped had survived), with a daughter of his own. Far from Earth, he could imagine this possibility and have no evidence to prove him wrong.

He didn't want to entertain the idea that any of his dreams might come true. That Tony might be used against him, just as Thor was used against Loki; that Tony might die and he die with him, with no one to ever know what became of the Man of Iron; that Tony might stop him from making a choice that needed to be made.

Thor presses a hand against Tony's cheek.

"How would Earth fare without its best defender?"

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

Tony leaned into his hand, cupping the back of it. “You said there could be a way to reverse it. You’re not going it alone.” He pressed a kiss to the warm, touch palm. “What’s a god without a believer?”

[st_ormbreaker]

Thor waits until he's sure he can steady his voice before he finally speaks.

"Okay," he says finally. "When the time comes, I will take you with me."

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

Satisfied with Thor’s answer as he was, he wasn’t done. “But I need something.”

[st_ormbreaker]

"What do you need?"

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

“I need the truth. Thor. Please.” The desperation wouldn’t be held back, almost gasping the plea.

[st_ormbreaker]

"Tony..."

It's the only thing Thor could manage. Even if his mouth was somehow functioning, he isn't sure he could utter anything more than what he said already.

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

"I don't know what it's like to be Thor. I'll own that. Different people, different things." Tony kept a tight hold of his hand, lips twitching with the weight of holding his emotion back. "I'll own that. But--we're a team. Be angry if you want. Grieve if you want. Just, goddamn it, let me do it with you."

[st_ormbreaker]

"I know."

Thor takes a few steps backwards and sits down on the edge of the bed. Thor should trust Tony. He does trust Tony. But still, he can't find a way to say it.

Thor rubs at his eyes. "But not tonight. Not right now." Tony had clearly gone through enough tonight already.

And he wants more time to steel himself.

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

"I'd forgive you." He was immediately replying, turning to watch after the large man.

[st_ormbreaker]

Thor lets out a laugh that comes out more like a heavy breath.

"I wouldn't be so certain."

Thor can't forgive himself; he can't imagine anyone else doing anything but the same.

[st_arkravinghazelnut]

“You wouldn’t.” Tony fell back against the door. “I would.”